I love Christmas movies, I really do, but the thing I cannot stand about them is that they aren't real. Especially Hallmark Christmas movies. Hallmark movies alone are just awful, corny and completely unrealistic , but Hallmark Christmas movies lack what something that my Christmas's are never with out, dysfunction and booze. Honestly I don't remember a single Christmas, or any Holiday for that matter, where there wasn't booze involved at least marginally. In fact I had my first taste of alcohol on Christmas.
I was about eleven years old and had a terrible habit of drinking out of other peoples cups. It was Christmas morning and therefor dad was sitting on the computer, trying to figure out how to install some kind of computer game that we had gotten for Christmas. He had a tall glass of "orange juice" on the tale next to him and I decided it would be okay to take a big gulp of it with out asking him if I could have a sip.After the "juice" made it's way down my throat, I made a disgusted face and looked at my dad who was not paying a lick of attention to me. "Is that orange juice?" I asked after the damage was already done. "Not just orange juice, no." my dad replied. That was the Christmas I learned to always ask my dad what was in his cup before drinking out of it, especially on Christmas morning when him and my mom drank mimosas.
A more recent example of how real people celebrate Christmas was last Christmas when my twenty-one year old brother threw a two year old style hissy fit. He had worked the late shift the night before and was still asleep when the rest of us were awake. We told him we would be opening gifts at noon and we would come and wake him up then. But when mom went upstairs to wake him up, he yelled at her and refused to get up. So, we decided to open up the gifts we had given each other and wait for him to open up his gifts.When he came down stairs and found out we had already opened some gifts he got upset and started yelling at us. Ya see, these are the kind of Christmas events that belong on television. not sap stories about Christmas miracles and mean people turning into saints because of it. I want Christmas movies about the things that Christmas is built on, angry siblings and drunk parents.
